Saturday, July 16, 2011

So, I was minding my own business....

...until I saw pics.....of a peach......Jack....Jack and the peach....Jack holding a peach....Jack handing a peach to a man....I think I have an idea  what this movie is about....I think Jack's playing a naughty man who's trying to lure people by using peaches....I don't believe for a second that it's an allegory of life itself ....No dudes, no way....I know what I'm seeing here...

PEACHES.

Also, that stare?

NO WAY.


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PEACHES. They are hairy and juicy and sweeeet. Jack wants you to have one.



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UNFGH this is the second pic and I am already unable to function.



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The vest of sexiness. The shades. The hair...The shirt...Overall awesomeness...DYING SLOWLY INSIDE....and I am loving every second of it.



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OMG. What is this. WHAT IS THIS. Do I even need to tell you how sexy his pose in this picture is? Even though I don't need to, I'll say it anyway: HIS POSE IS SO SEXY I AM CRYING.


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OMGGGGGG TEH PEACH. I want to taste it. OMG his eyes....


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Is the director asking Jack to lie next to that guy? What a lucky dude...


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Those legs....In sexy bootcut jeans...*cries*



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Yeah, I can't breathe now, I hope you're happy , Jack. I think the guy is dying too, because apparently neither of us are able to cope with his explody sexiness. I'm not even going to mention a certain body part because this is not helping me at all. All I'm gonna say is: I WISH WE HAD A FULL VIEW. ....maybe it's better that we didn't, because I don't know what I'd do then...


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The adventures of the vest of sexiness continue....Did I mention his sideburns? Well, I am mentioning them now. Let's see....I want to lick them, one by one. First the right one, then the left one and if I feel like it, I will lick the right one again...Plus, his nose. It should be licked too.


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HNNNGH. I bet these are his own glasses too. ....good, now I can fantasize easily.....WHAT? Shhhhh.




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THE SEXY SUIT IS BACK. YAYAYAYAYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!! And the hair got spikier!!!! THIS MUST BE HEAVEN.


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THAT......girl. I am jealous. Actually I am jealous of both of these women. I want to touch nice things like she does...LIFE IS SO UNFAIR I WANT TO SCREAM.



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No no, this time I really can't breathe...I'll become a zombie in no time....His tie is a bit short and his legs are still long and I still want to run my fingers through his hair. SO MANY EMOTIONS SO LITTLE TIME.



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What is this sexy car? It looks old....Also, I approve how his behind looks.


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THIS. THISSSSS. THIS IS THE LAST BLOW TO MY MENTAL HEALTH. HELLO, I AM MENTALLY A ZOMBIE NOW, A.K.A. A MENTAL ZOMBIE. Why you do thisssss, Jack.....why...I was already too weak.....you had to smile like that, didn't you...WHYYYYYYYYYY... D:



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UNGHHGFHFJHHFJJHHFFHHJHHJJGHJGH. BAD SUNLIGHT , BAD....wait...not so bad because it caused him to do the sexy eye squinting.....


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I think Mr Clark, who took these pics, was also aware of his extreme sexiness...I MEAN HOW COULDN'T HE BE? 


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UGH first the women, now the men.....PEOPLE CAN NOT STOP TOUCHING HIS SEXY SUIT.



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Oh....I know something was missing and there it is: HIS BIG HAND.Correction: HIS MANLY, SEXY BIG HAND.


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STOP TOUCHING THE SEXY SUIT, DUDE. This must be love at first sight...


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I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS ANYMORE PLZ HELP. Now we also have manhandling? D: D: D: WHY GOD WHY. ..also, is it me or do they look like they are about to kiss.....



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It's amazing how one fruit can have so many meanings... No, I wasn't looking at Urban Dictionary. I would never do such a thing. I'm a zombie, zombies don't look at online dictionaries....They just stare at the pretty sideburns for hours and hours and hours...



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LOL Jack's a total creepster. He's watching the guy through the trees...



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I think that guy wants Jack's glasses... Can you blame him?



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HAI. Do you see what I'm seeing? HAIIII. How come a blurry pic can be that hot and sexy?



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The pants that scream of elegance and style... KJKJKJKJJJJJJJJJJJJ.



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As if my head didn't already explode multiple times....I'm pretty sure he is doing this on purpose...This is not an innocent pose...No sir, it's not! I smell conspiracy....He must know how dangerous his overall sexiness is.....HE MUST.


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Oh gods, now he's waving his sexy finger around while staring sexily at the camera...WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING, JACK....conspiracy, I tell you!!!!!



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I like trees... *is numb*



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Look how green it is.... *is very numb*


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I need refreshments... *is totally numb*

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